Are you prepared to run, 6 months pregnant, in the pouring rain and hail to put away the brand new dually truck with diamond plate flat bed? It’s going to hail and you’ll be kicking yourself (not just the baby in your belly kicking you while you run) if that truck has even one tiny dent.
Can you make it through countless mornings of getting up an extra hour early to feed the bottle calves, get the kids ready, go to work in town all day, spend your lunch hour running home to feed the bottle calves again, then running to the elevator for more milk replacer after work before picking up the kids, and coming home to feed your family before feeding the bottle calves again? Because it doesn’t matter if you’re exhausted, those bottle calves equal income, and they need food to grow.
How do you feel about washing coveralls multiple times in a row because they’re covered in cow manure? Or maybe when they’re covered in afterbirth because the farmer you love just held a prolapsed cow, waiting for the vet, only to watch her die in the chute. I can promise you, no matter how much stain remover and presoak you use - it will take multiple washes. And it still might not completely come out, but every stain will remind that farmer of the moments he lived in them.
What about attending family events, friends’ weddings, pre-k graduation, dinner parties, and multiple sporting events alone? Not just once. Regularly. Or how do you feel about not having a real “date night” for 2-3 months in a row, twice per year? That’s how long it takes to plant and harvest. Harvest doesn’t pause for the date night you’d desperately love to have.
Maybe you should look at whether or not you’re willing to run in torrential downpours after getting yourself and four kids into the house before it starts, only to realize the shed doors are open - where thousands of dollars in seed and equipment are being drenched - regardless of the fact you’re having a great hair day... because your curls won’t matter when you think about the reality of what that rain soaking those bags of seed means. Are you willing to throw those curls up in a messy bun, put on the nearest hat you can find (even if it’s your husband’s work hat that reeks of sweat), and run like hell towards the shed, only to scream a cuss word when you get there and realize a half-full pallet of bags is soaked? Are you willing to unload that pallet, ever-so-gently handling every bag praying it doesn’t burst open, lay them separately in a dry space (to hopefully dry out enough they’re not unusable), then squeegee the water out before your husband even gets home from pulling equipment out of the fields?
If you can answer “yes” to all of those, then you’re a whole lot more prepared to be a farmer’s wife than I was. The blue eyed boy in a big green tractor (and loud truck) pulled one over on me and I had absolutely no clue what I was in for. I didn’t know I’d ever be in any of those situations, which means I can’t honestly tell you what my answer would have been if anyone ever posed those questions to me...
You see, the reality is that no one can prepare you for this life; and no one can ever replace it, either. I may not ever fully understand farming, but I’m starting to get a pretty decent grasp on being a farmer’s wife.
It’s a lot of work, but without the work, we wouldn’t be able to enjoy all the pleasantries that come along with it. I wouldn’t know the joy of watching my toddlers squeal with delight when they see the line of tractors coming up our driveway. I wouldn’t know how cute little baby lambs are when they jump, skip, hop, and run around the pasture. I wouldn’t get to see three generations of farmer’s leaving the house, only to learn lessons that could never be taught in a classroom (or anywhere else, for that matter).
I never wanted to be a farmer, and I never really thought about being a farmer’s wife. I had no choice other than to grab the bull by the horns (it’s been a little longer than 7 seconds), and trust me when I say it’s not going to be easy, Good Lord there are some VERY hard days, but I can promise you it will be worth it.
